John: the beloved disciple, a man changed by love

John, fisherman, son of Zebedee and brother of James, friends to Peter and Andrew, has the distinction of being called the disciple whom Jesus loved (John 13:23). It is hard to believe that this beloved disciple was, at first, ambitious, judgmental and yet becomes the one who writes about the transforming power of Christ’s love and how it is available to all. He would write one of the four gospels and three letters with the central theme of God’s love. The word “love” would appear fifty-seven times in the gospel of John and forty-six times in 1 John. He would also write Revelation with the central theme of God’s justice. Who was John? What is the purpose of his gospel? How should we love as Christians? 

John was called by Jesus, with his brother, and they both immediately left their fishing nets and followed. As mentioned with Peter and James, John was chosen to be among the inner circle and saw the Transfiguration (Matthew 17:1-13, Mark 9:2-13, Luke 9:28-36). Along with James, John had a tendency for outbursts of selfishness and anger. One instance, John calls Jesus’s attention to someone else using Jesus’s name to drive out demons, expecting Jesus to stop this man because he wasn’t one of the twelve disciples (Mark 9:38, Luke 9:49-50). He was with Jesus in the Garden of Gethsemane (Matthew 26:36-37, Mark 14:32-42). At his crucifixion, Jesus asks John to care for his mother, Mary, and Mary to take John as her son (John 19:25-25). John was with Peter as he healed a man at the gate called Beautiful (Acts 3:1-10). Along with Peter, John would stand firm before the Sanhedrin (Acts 4:1-22). John would later be exiled to the island of Patmos where he would receive the vision and write the book of Revelation. 

While Matthew and Luke included genealogies in their gospels for certain purposes, to establish Jesus as from the House of David both biologically from his mother, Mary, and legally from his earthly father, Joseph. However, John started with Jesus as the preexistent, eternal Word. “In the beginning was the Word, and the Word was with God, and the Word was God. He was with God in the beginning (John 1:1-2). Jesus is the agent of Creation as God, the Father, spoke and Jesus, the son, made it happen. This is further illustrated by the seven “I Am” statements: Bread of Life (John 6:35), the Light of the world (John 8:12), the Gate (John 10:7-9), the Good Shepherd (John 11:11-14), the Resurrection and the Life (John 11:25), the Way, the Truth, and the Life (John 14:6), and the True Vine (John 15:1.5). John describes a situation in which Jesus states he is eternal when He said, “I will tell you the truth before Abraham, I am!” (John 8:58). “I am” is a statement that would have had a huge significant impact on the Jews as it was a statement God made to Moses (Exodus 4:14). 

John began his journey with Jesus as a selfish man, looking out for himself, only to become a man of compassion and love. How? From the transforming love of Jesus Christ. Loving one another is the most basic, simplest part of Christianity. However, our ability to love is often shaped by our experience of love. Being loved is the most powerful motivation. God’s love is a great motivation for change and there is nothing that can remove God’s love from us (Isaiah 54:10). We are to love one another. Not just love with words but with actions and in truth (1 John 3:18). We say “I love you,” they are empty words until there is an action behind it. Jesus said “I love you” and he died on the cross. Jesus commands that we love each other (Matthew 22:39). He also said that there is no greater love than to lay down one’s life for his friends (John 15:13). Sacrificial love isn’t just dying, it is helping, giving, and meeting needs of another before our own puts love into practice.

In conclusion, after all he had seen and experienced with Jesus, he would leave behind ambition and embrace affection. John became the beloved disciple, the one whom Jesus loved. John would write his gospel to show that Jesus is the pre existent Word becoming flesh (John 1:14) and brought the world his message of love. Love is more than words, it is an action, a sacrifice of putting others before ourselves. Sadly, there are Christians who talk the talk but don’t walk the walk. I know I sometimes struggle loving someone the way God would want me to, especially after I’ve been hurt or wronged. It is a constant prayer that He will change my heart and help me adjust my attitude. If His love can change John, I know He can change me. 

Carrie Fisher: more than just Princess Leia

Carrie Fisher is best known as Princess Leia from a little film called Star Wars. But did you know that she is also an accomplished novelist, screenwriter and mental health advocate. Recently, I can able to get a few of her books and I will review them briefly.

Postcards from the Edge is her best known book as it was also made into a blockbuster film which starred Meryl Streep and Shirley Maclaine. It is the story of Suzanne Vale, an actress from an acting family who finds herself in a rehab facility after overdosing on Percodan. As she completes rehab, she must find a way to restart her life that she says “I narrate a life I’m reluctant to live.” This story was inspired by Ms. Fisher’s own struggles with her drug addiction and recovery. The story explores the question who someone is and why he/she does or doesn’t do things. It had some great insights that caught my attention. 

Wishing Drinking is her first memoir was she explores her life was it was entangled in the greatest scandal of Hollywood. Her childhood began as the child of America’s Sweethearts: Eddie Fisher and Debbie Reynolds. Her playgrounds were studios and backlots. She discusses her highs as her brief relationship and marriage to Paul Simon. When she writes about him, you can tell she really loved him but it just didn’t work out. And her lows as life with a philandering father and her growing drug addiction. She discusses the events which lead to her diagnosis of manic-depression. She has learned to deal with the manic episodes which leads her on a “wild ride of a mood” and the depression which leads her to “piss and moan.”  I love that Ms. Fisher is very candid and doesn’t mince words. She says it as she sees it.

The Best Awful There Is is the sequel to Postcards from the Edge as Suzanne Vale must deal with the revelation that the father of her child as left her for another man. She must pick of the pieces and learn to live with new situation. It soon becomes too much and she is institutionalized as manic-depressed. Ms. Fisher once again draws inspiration from her own experiences and brings a touching and sometimes hilarious fashion.

Shockaholic is her second memoir in which she discusses her life in recovery, her continuing struggles with sobriety due to her bipolar disorder and the reconciliation with her father near the end of his life. She calls herself a “fairly intelligent person who does stupid things. Incredibly stupid things.” She is brutally honest and pokes fun at her Hollywood pedigree.

I love Ms. Fisher’s brutal honesty and while her humor is a little too vulgar for my tastes, I did find some of her comments hilarious. I also found her to be deeply insightful and gives such an honest look of what life is often like with a mental illness. She often poked fun at the comments about her looks since everyone expects her to look like Princess Leia even at the age of 58. I think she is still very beautiful and looks wonderful. 

Unless by Carol Shields: a review

“Unless” by Carol Shields is the story of a woman, Reta, who faces a crisis when her oldest daughter, Norah, who decides to drop out of college and panhandle on the street corner in Toronto. Norah says nothing and only has a sign which reads GOODNESS. This book would be Ms. Shields’ last book as she passed away on July 16, 2003 after a battle with breast cancer at the age of 68.
The story opens in the summer of 2000. Reta, a writer in her mid-forties, lists her writing accomplishments and the life events that occurred alongside them. The birth of her children and her friendship and working relationship with fellow writer Danielle Westerman. Her husband, Tom, is a doctor. It was confusing as to what type of doctor Tom is. She writes in one chapter: “Tom, who is a family physician and has a broad scientific background” and throughout the rest of the book, Tom is researching trilobites, a fossil group of extinct marine arthropods. Why would a family physician be studying trilobites? Is this a hobby? Ms. Shields doesn’t make this clear. The main story is Reta’s mission to figure out why her daughter, Norah, would drop out of college and panhandle on the street. Her mission as well as her writing a second novel. Reta begins to realize that women authors aren’t named among the great minds and resents her editor when he suggests that men protagonists make for better sellers.
“Unless” was a very difficult book to read. First, Reta is very unsympathic. As I read, I couldn’t help but realize that I didn’t care about her, her writing or her mission to have women author be counted among the greats. Ms. Shields’ assumption that women seen as good to write “domestic” subjects such as romance novels and that women writers have to have a male protagonist. When she is clearly ignoring many women authors who write female protagonists outside the domestic scene. For example, Patricia Cornwell and her Dr Kay Scarpetta. Second, Ms. Shields likes to use big and obscure words with little clue as to their meaning. I have a fairly good vocabulary and if I don’t know the words I’m usually good at figuring them out by the sentences around them or I look the word up just to clarify my understand. However, in this book, there were 4 words that were so obscure that the sentences around them did not help in their understanding. For example, lachrymose was used in this sentence, “’She is such a lachrymose woman.’ I once heard a man say that disdainfully about his sister; he might have been talking about me in my present state.” For those who don’t know, lachrymose means to cause tears or cry often. What about that sentence helps the reader understand the meaning if he or she doesn’t already know? Third, Reta’s “feminist” mission irritated me. It was a constant borage of “what about women?” The character’s letters to various authors and even one man’s obituary about their omission of women authors was overdone. Reading it, I was thinking “Ok, I get it. Women don’t get the same acknowledge as men.”
The letter to the man who just died was a little creepy and just wrong. The only aspect of this book that I did like was the reason behind Norah’s crisis. The author does give a little foreshadowing but if the reader isn’t reading closely, he or she will miss it. Unfortunately, the rest of the book, the characters are so bland that I kept looking and saying “how many more pages?” and when I do that I know it’s not a good book.
Before writing my review, I wanted to get the impression of other readers, in case I was missing something about the book. I went to goodreads.com and while those who liked the book were already fans of Ms. Shields, many of the reviewers had the same problems I did. One reviewer wrote “I didn’t like the idea that flowed thru this book that women are oppressed and of no significance to men.” Another wrote, “self-congratulatory and trite.” Lastly, a reviewer wrote, “The character was too self-absorbed.”
“Unless” was a boring book about a woman struggling with her life, her writing and places the blame on the men who do not acknowledge the accomplishments of women.