Friends, Lovers and the Big Terrible Thing: a painful and gritty memoir with humor, wit and stark realism

Friends, Lovers, and the Big Terrible Thing by Matthew Perry is a painful and gritty memoir. The opening line: “Hi, my name is Matthew, although you may know me by another name. My friends call me Matty. And I should be dead” says it all. The riveting story of acclaimed actor Matthew Perry from his childhood and his dream of fame, to addiction and recovery in the aftermath of a life-threatening health scare. A story of a young boy being shuffled from his mother’s in Montreal to his father’s in Los Angeles. A story of a fourteen year old nationally ranked tennis star in Canada. A story of a twenty four year old who would land the role of a lifetime and the fame he always dreamt of. To the outside world, Matthew Perry had it all. However, hidden behind the smile and wise cracking jokester was a man who was lonely, feeling unworthy of love and in a dark battle of addiction to drugs and alcohol. Matthew Perry’s journey to sobriety is filled with his trademark humor and a stark realism that many have never seen and he takes readers on this journey with frankness, self-awareness and extreme vulnerability. 

Many who know me know that I love Friends. It is my comfort show. A show I watch when I want to laugh and to relax. My favorite character has always been Chandler Bing. The vulnerable man who uses humor to hide his fears, insecurities and loneliness. Matthew Perry has been one of my favorite actors for years and his death in 2023 hit me hard. When he released this memoir, I was torn about reading it. I wanted to read it and yet, I was afraid. Recently, I got the opportunity to listen to the audiobook. I usually don’t listen to audiobooks; but there is something about this book and listening to Matthew Perry narrating it. It was difficult to listen to. It is deeply intimate and eye-opening. I was in tears, knowing he had come so far, so filled with hope and yet he is gone from this world. His voice reminds me of someone else I know who battled with addiction and it added to the pain of his story. He intended his memoir to help those who struggle with sobriety and I pray that it does. I highly recommend Friends, Lovers, and the Big Terrible Thing. 

Friends, Lovers and the Big Terrible Thing 

is available in hardcover, paperback, eBook and audiobook