The Comfort of Secrets: a story of courage, strength, and bravery

The Comfort of Secrets by Christine Nolfi is the second book in the Sweet Lake series. Readers to the small town of Sweet Lake, the Wayfair Inn and the quirky and well-meaning Sirens. This story focuses on Linnie’s friend, Cat. After a failed business and horrible dating years, she’s ready to turn a new leaf and desperately needs a win. First, she feels she needs to convince others that she is taking her new responsibilities as the Wayfair’s new events director seriously. Second, she needs to control her attraction to Ryan D’Angelo, the new charming ad executive hired to promote the inn. Ryan hides a deep secret, a heartache so scarring that Cat can’t help but draw closer to him. Will his secrets derail her new life and the Wayfair itself? Or could they both gain a life they never thought they could have?

The Comfort of Secrets is a wonderful story of courage, strength, and finding that you are braver than you know. I could not put this story down. I loved Cat and Ryan’s story. Cat is desperate to show she can do the job and yet deep down she is afraid she can’t. Ryan is charming and yet his smile hides a heartbreaking past. From the theme that we do not go through life alone, we aren’t meant to be alone, to finding the strength to move on from the traumas of life. There is plenty of excitement, drama and feel good moments. One of my favorite quotes from the story is “Some hurts don’t heal. With luck, they cover over with enough scar tissue to make them bearable. But they don’t go away.” How very true! I highly recommend The Comfort of Secrets. 

The Comfort of Secrets is available in paperback, eBook, and audiobook

Sweet Lake, book 1, is available in paperback, eBook, and audiobook

The Wise Woman of Abel: what is wisdom?

Wisdom is sought by many, but only a few find it and apply it. Many think they are wise but few truly are. Greek poet Sophocles (496-406 BCE) said “Wisdom outweighs any wealth.” And Roman statesman Lucius Annaeus Seneca (5 BCE - 65 CE) stated that no man is wise by chance. The wise woman of Abel is a short story told in 2 Samuel 20:14-22. In a few verses, she is able to avoid innocent bloodshed and destruction of her city. While her faithful city is infiltrated by a rebellious leader, she shows wisdom and courage in the faces of grave danger. She acts quickly and decisively to save the citizens of her city from King David’s besieging army. What were the events that led to the siege of her city? How was she able to use wisdom? What is wisdom? And what does wisdom entail? 

Hostilities were high between the “people of Judah” (David’s tribe of origin in the south) and “the people of Israel” (the ten northern tribes) following David’s suppression of Absalom’s revolt (2 Samuel 19:41-43) (Camp, 1999). The wise woman’s story begins in 2 Samuel 20:14 when Sheba from the tribe of Benjamin attempted to revolt against the king. Joab, the king’s commander, chased him to Abel Beth Maacah in the north. The city was a walled fortified city and served as protection for the surrounding areas. Sheba hides in the city as Joab sets up siege ramps in preparation to take the city. Before he calls for the siege, a woman appears on the wall requesting to speak to the commander. She gives a simple speech in which she reminds the commander that Abel Beth Maacah is a faithful and peaceful city known as the “mother of Israel” (2 Samuel 20:19). Joab demands that Sheba be handed over and he’ll leave the city alone. The woman then states Sheba’s head will be thrown over the wall. She rallies her fellow citizens to act and soon Sheba’s head came over the wall (2 Samuel 20:22). 

Wisdom is often difficult to define because it can encompass so much. Merriam-Webster defines wisdom as “knowledge that is gained by having many experiences in life” or “a good sense or judgment.” Psychologists tend to define wisdom as the integration of knowledge, experience and deep understanding as well as a tolerance of the uncertainties of life with a sense of calm. Three components have been identified that are often found in wise individuals. First, cognitive components. This is where knowledge and experience play a role. Wise individuals often engage in intellectual humility. Intellectual humility is recognizing and owning one’s intellectual limitations while pursuing deeper knowledge, truth and understanding. There is also an open-mindedness component in which wise individuals are usually receptive to a wide variety of ideas, arguments and information. Even if they could eventually reject these ideas, arguments and information, they will, at least, consider it before making their final decision. Second, reflective components. The ability to examine one’s self and situations. Wise individuals have the ability to engage in perspective-taking which involves seeing a situation through the perspective of another. Third, prosocial components. This is where benevolence and compassion are involved. The wise woman of Abel certainty had the citizens of Abel in mind when she found the courage to confront Joab and negotiate a peaceful resolution.

One of my favorite verses on wisdom is Proverbs 3:13-18 which describes the blessings one receives when they find wisdom and gains understanding. How does one find wisdom? Essentially wisdom sees the big picture rather than the small picture directly in front of us. Wise living starts with fearing the Lord. Fear the Lord is not being afraid of Him; but, the deep respect and reverent humility for God’s majesty, recognizing Him as the Creator (Stilley, 2014). Wisdom grows with receiving God’s word. Psalm 19:7 says “The law of the LORD is perfect, refreshing the soul. The statutes of the LORD are trustworthy, making wise the simple.” God’s word imparts wisdom to the humble, to those who exercise a childlike submission to Him and follow His commands. We often must ask for wisdom. James 1:5 says, “If any of you lacks wisdom, you should ask God, who gives generously to all without finding fault, and it will be given to you.” This idea reminds me of the Serenity Prayer. Written by American theologian Reinhold Neibuhr (1892-1971), the simple prayer asks for the wisdom to know between what can be changed and what cannot. 

What made this story special? The men in the story took the stereotypical, macho approach to seek and destroy. Yet one woman sought a peaceful solution to spare the many innocent lives who would have been in harm’s way. Joab only saw his immediate goal: to capture Sheba. The wise woman of Abel saw the bigger picture of many innocent lives lost and a city destroyed just for one man. Wisdom often comes with knowledge and experience. Cato the Elder (234-149 BCE) once said that the wise learn from fools while fools rarely imitate the success of the wise. Wisdom comes from asking for it in prayer and seeking it through God’s word. From my own experience, wisdom comes from always seeking knowledge, to never stop learning because there is always something more to know and discover. Wisdom also takes courage and bravery to stand up against all odds. 

References

Camp, Claudia V. (December 31, 1999). Wise Woman of Abel Beth-Maacah: Bible. Jewish Women’s Archive. https://jwa.org/encyclopedia/article/wise-woman-of-abel-beth-maacah-bible. Retrieved December 28, 2021. 

Stilley, Lloyd (January 1, 2014). Sermon: The Wisdom of God - Romans 16, 1 Corinthians 1. Lifeway. https://www.lifeway.com/en/articles/sermon-wisdom-god-romans-16-1-corinthians-1. Retrieved December 28, 2021. 

Ezra, Nehemiah, and Esther: when God seems silent

Ezra, Nehemiah and Esther are known as the post-captivity books. Ezra, the faithful scribe, records the Jews returning to their homeland after 70 years of captivity in Babylon. His records show God’s faithfulness to keep His promise to restore his people to their land. Nehemiah demonstrates leaders as he guides the Jews to rebuild the walls of Jerusalem. Finally, Esther is the story of courage to stand up to certain death for the livelihood of others and the celebration created as a reminder of that courage. Many people will point out that God is silent in these books. Although God doesn’t speak in these books, He isn’t inactive as the events unfold and His guidance is seen in the faithfulness and devotion of these three people.

Ezra, the true and faithful scribe, records the events which return the Jews to Jerusalem. The Lord moved in the heart of Cyrus, the king of Persia as he proclaimed that the temple was to be rebuilt in Jerusalem (Ezra 1:1-2). Despite opposition from some Persian officials, the rebuilding begins with the king’s increasing support. Ezra was a committed student of the Law. He was determined to follow and teach the God’s word. Once the Jews were back in Jerusalem, he was determined to get the Jews back on track with God as he taught the Law to the returning families. Ezra showed the people that God kept His promise to return them to their land and they must show their gratitude by returning to God and the practice of His Word. “For Ezra had devoted himself to the study and observance of the Law of the Lord and to teaching its decrees and laws in Israel” (Ezra 7:10). Ezra is an example of how devotion and commitment to knowing and practicing God’s Word has a direct effect on how God works in our lives.

Nehemiah, the rebuilder of walls, was the cupbearer to the king (Nehemiah 1:11). A cupbearer was an important position. He was to ensure the safety and quality of the king’s drink. It also gave him unique opportunities to speak with the king. As Nehemiah waited for the right moment to approach the king with his requests, King Artaxerxes notices Nehemiah’s distress and opens the door for Nehemiah ask to be sent to Jerusalem to rebuild the walls of the city (Nehemiah 2:1-6). In Jerusalem, Nehemiah was the type of leader which gets the work done. He carefully planned and encourage teamwork as he solved problems which often arise when people work together. He also have courage and tremendous faith to get the work done even if it meant getting dirty with the workers himself. He was a leader that people will follow. “I also told them about the gracious hand of my God upon me and what they king had said to me. They replied, ‘Let us start rebuilding.’ So they began the good work” (Nehemiah 2:18).

Esther, the Jewish orphan who become queen and she was placed in a position to risk for her life for others. Her cousin, Mordecai, had overheard a plot to kill the Jews by the government official Haman and he became distress as it was a king’s decree. Word got back to Esther about the plot and Mordecai pleads with her to tell the king (Esther 4:13-14). She agrees, “I will go to the king, even though it is against the law. And if I perish, I perish” (Esther 4:16). Esther devises a clever plan to expose the plot to the king by throwing a feast for Haman. At the banquet, she makes one more request. She asks the king to spare her people and the king is outraged that such a thing was plotted (Esther 7:3-5). She exposes Haman as the plotter and he is hanged. The king then decrees that the Jews had the right to protect themselves from whoever tried to do them harm (Esther 7:11). In response to these events, the Jews began a new celebration, Purim. Purim is celebrated as a day of joy and feasting. It is a day of giving presents to one another in remembrance of Esther’s bravery and courage.

In conclusion, while God is silent in these three books, He certainly isn’t inactive. He sent in motion the Jews return to their lands. He can be seen in the story of Ezra, a man who never forgot where he was from. He worked within the law of the land he lived with respect but he never let God’s law become second. He can be seen in the story of Nehemiah, a godly leader, one who isn’t afraid to work alongside the men to complete the work as well as caring for his men when the practice wasn’t so generous. And He can be seen in the story of Esther, a woman who hid her true heritage, only to reveal it when a greater threat loomed. From these examples, we need to remember that when God seems to be silent, He is working. He is working in your life and when you least expect it, that work will be reveal. Follow the examples of Ezra, Nehemiah and Esther, keep the faith and trust in God. 

Heroes: why do they appeal to us?

What comes to mind when you hear the word hero? Do you think of a sport hero like Michael Jordan or Babe Ruth? Do you think of a mythical hero like Hercules or Robin Hood? Or do you think of a comic book superhero like Superman or Captain America? Or an ordinary person who beats extraordinary odds? Whoever you think of, a hero is an important person to you. The word “hero” is from the Greek and it represents a mortal who accomplishes a feat beyond the normal scope of human abilities that leads him or her to worship among the gods. Most heroes have certain characteristics which gives them the hero image and rise above a mere mortal. Heroes appeal to us in some way. They speak to us in ways we may not understand. Heroes are very personal to us.

Today, heroes are people we admire and want to emulate. A hero is a person who is admired or idealized for courage, outstanding achievement or noble qualities. Heroes can have five common characteristics. First, courage or bravery is the number one quality referred to when speaking of a hero. The triumph over fear and daunting odds in order to achieve a goal. It’s the firefighter who will rush in a burning building to save a complete stranger. In war, it is a person who sacrifices his own safety and possibly his life for others. There are many famous and not-so-famous examples of war heroes. So many stories which we will never know all their names and their incredible acts. Second, selflessness of heroes is another common trait. Putting others’ needs and concerns before his or her own. Heroes will often never think of the risk to themselves when others are in need. Third, humility and modesty, often wishing to hide from the spotlight is another trait of heroes. This trait is common among war heroes who don’t like speaking about the events which made them a hero. Lastly, caring and kindness for others which seems to be obvious otherwise the other traits wouldn’t be possible without concern for others.

What is the appeal of heroes? Is it because we want someone to look up to? Someone to strive to be like? In Greek mythology, heroes were godlike and would seem impossible to emulate. There are many reasons why heroes have an appeal, I’ve chosen my top 3 reasons. First, heroes often reveal our missing qualities. They display what behaviors are needed in order to succeed, better society and defeat the bad guys. They often behave in way we wished we would. Second, heroes save us when we’re in trouble. This can be seen in the powerful appeal of comic book superheroes. It is seen in real life with admiration for society’s protectors and rescuers: law enforcement, firefighters, EMTs, paramedics and military personnel. These men and women put their lives on the line in order to keep us safe and to get us out of harm’s way. Third, heroes bring hope in a dark world. Their stories are uplifting and inspiring that not everyone in this world is out to do harm and go above and beyond in order to provide safety, security and justice. These stories don’t always have to be about life and death situations. We’ve all heard the story of the Gainesville, Florida cop who responded to a noisy kids call by playing basketball with them. He was a hero that day.

When I think of heroes, I don’t think of a single person. I think of people who I admired for their extraordinary accomplishments despite their circumstances and their flaws. A hero is someone who isn’t afraid to fail and try again. I often think when people label someone as a hero, they fail to acknowledge someone’s shortcomings. They put them a high pedestal that when he or she does fail, it crushes the image of their hero. It can be seen most often with celebrities and sports stars. For example, recently with Cam Newton’s poor behavior after the Super Bowl. It was a disappointing loss and I understand his gloomy mood. But because he was so built up and elevated that people were shocked by his behavior. Even his “apology” a couple days later seem to me less than sincere. However, he has the opportunity to learn from this experience. To pick himself up and say “I’m going to try again. I’m not going to let one disappointment get the better of me.” To me, a hero is someone who pushes through despite fear, despite doubts and despite criticisms from others. A hero is someone who gives and sacrifices without thanks or recognition. Heroes are larger than life yet humble and gracious.

Heroes are very important to us. They demonstrate how ordinary people can be extraordinary. Heroes can be any one you look up to either real or imaginary from literature or film. They demonstrate what is right in the world and what the world needs more of. In a recent book I read, a character said “A hero’s bravery has to be unplanned. A genuine response to a crisis. It has to come from heart without any thought of reward” (Riordan). Along those lines, Nelson Mandela once said, “I learned that courage was not the absence of fear, but the triumph over it. The brave man is not he who does not feel afraid, but he who conquers that fear.” The real and everyday heroes are the ones who I admire the most. Those who put their lives on the line to keep others safe. Those who sacrifice their own needs and wants so that others can have theirs. The heroes that you may never know their name or what they have done for you but heroic all the same.