Monday, October 31, 2022

The Shulammite Woman: a love worth waiting for

The Shulammite Woman is an unnamed woman featured in Song of Songs (or Song of Solomon in some translations). She is the only female voice which speaks directly to us. Ruth and Esther’s voices are mediated by narrators. The Shulammite Woman boldly declares her longing and desires to be united to her lover in marriage. While her joy is to be so passionately in love, she knows sorrow as they have been separated at times. What is her story and why would it be included in the Bible? What does the Song of Songs inform us about romantic love? What does it tell us about love and God’s timing? 

She is young, beautiful, and desirable. He is handsome, strong and agile. He is either a shepherd or a king (legend says he is King Solomon). Song of Songs is a love poem with erotic imagery. The Shulammite Woman is as passionate as her lover. As she initiates contact with him and openly declares her feelings. She yearns for his kisses. So in love she is that even his name sounds sweet. The song captures the desires, the anguish, the tension, the longing and the ecstasy of love. While God is not mentioned and seems not to have a role, either active or inactive in the story, there are a few theories why it would be included in the Scriptures. First, it is believed it is an allegory for God’s love for Israel and ultimately, Christ’s love for the Church. Second, it is thought to be an expression of the sacredness of marriage. It is the fullest expression of love between a man and a woman. Anyone who believes that the Bible teaches negative views on sex has not read Song of Songs. 

The story of the Shulammite Woman is simply to love and be loved. It is everyone’s ultimate goal in life, isn’t it? Song of Songs expresses both romantic love and sexual desire. While expressions for physical intimacy and pleasure are detailed but even the deepness of their feelings beyond just the physical. Romantic love. True love. Whatever you want to call it is a special aspect of life. It is a love that does not fade with time and only grows deeper and stronger. Time, disappointments or even tragedies can not wash it away. Someone is probably saying, what a minute! In the ancient world, marriages were often arranged. Yes, there were. Often for political or other beneficial circumstances. However, that does not mean that those marriages did not grow into loving commitments. A few Biblical examples are Isaac and Rachel (Genesis 24:67) and Elkanah and Hannah (1 Samuel 1:8). In marriage, the security of true love gives both men and women the freedom to initiate acts of love and expressions of their true feelings. 

There is one phrase that repeats throughout the Song of Songs that is the important lesson “Do not arouse or awaken love until it so desires” is stated by the Shulammite Woman. She implores the women of Jerusalem (and us) three times (2:7, 3:5, and 8:4). Feelings of attraction can often overshadow one’s voice of reason. Too many times an inimtiate relationship is rushed based on the power of those first feelings. The Shulammite Woman repeats this phrase as a reminder to not force romantic love to grow faster than is needed to become a lasting and fulfilling commitment. As a young single woman who wanted nothing more than to love and be loved, I looked for love in all the wrong faces. Until one day I had enough. I prayed and told God that I gave up. I would stop looking and allow him to bring the man He wanted as my husband. Timing is everything. A few short months after I prayed that prayer, God opened that door and allowed a man to come into my life. We’ve been happily married for thirteen years and while we have had our struggles, we are stronger now than when we first fell in love. 

In conclusion, the Shulammite Woman is a woman fiercely in love with her husband and is not afraid to express those feelings. The expressions of the Shulammite Woman and her husband is a great example of a passionate, committed marriage. She is an example that women can and should have an active role in the expression of love. Unfortunately, centuries of being told otherwise still influences thoughts on love and sex. Romantic love is an important part of a commitment relationship. However, it cannot and should not be rushed. It is in God’s timing as His wisdom is far better than ours. 


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